Where are you going Isaac??

Joy and Sorrow Kissing

I'm not a writer. I hate to write. But for some reason it's sounds therapeutic right now. I just got done with a good cry. My tears are ones of deep sorrow as well as deep joy. I think they were instigated by gratefulness but quickly got mixed up with pain. It seems that the deepest of pain is often accompanied by times of joy, and vice versa. I seem to be well acquainted with this dichotomy. A week after returning from my honeymoon, a time of perhaps the purest joy I've known, my friend Eric died of a brain tumor. That first year of marriage was a year of walking down a difficult road with my friend, Sacha and her kids. Joy and sorrow kissing. Tragedy hit again this year when my friend Midi and one of her sons were killed in a car accident. A few months later Andre's cousin died of cancer. Soon after, we welcomed our beautiful daughter, Chloe into the world. Joy and sorrow kissing again. In July, my best friend, Andrea, and her family moved to Atlanta. I really miss her. And then, this last Saturday, I found out that the counselor I worked with for 12 years at Roosevelt died in the Metrolink crash. But this Saturday my brother is marrying a simply delightful woman, and I get to see my sister. Joy and sorrow kissing again...



I often wonder what effect joy and sorrow have on one another. Does sorrow diminish our joy? Does joy numb the pain? I don't think so. And yet they don't ignore one another. Somehow they can both thrive. I'm sure they interact somehow. Do they enhance one another? I know that sorrow at times makes me more grateful. Today I enjoyed an "energetic" playdate, birthday lunch at my friend Becky's. I'm so glad for the friends God has surrounded me with. They are fun to be with, kind, wise, and generous. And yet, I can't help but think of last year's birthday when Midi and Andrea were also there. I guess my joy just feels a bit raw, if that makes any sense. But, not having Midi or Andrea here, makes me even more grateful for my other friends. I was loved well today!



Today I'm praying that God will help me to take in all that is before me. To not run from the pain but to also be able to deeply rejoice in the good things. I want to deeply rejoice at my brother's wedding on Saturday and I want to deeply mourn at Ron's funeral the following. I want to jump up and down with joy when I get off the plane and see Andrea. I want to give my sister a HUGE hug when I see her on Friday. I weep when I see pictures of Midi or Eric. Somehow that seems right. That's living. So God, help me to really live. Help me to love my husband and kids with all of who I am. Help me to worship you with all of who I am. Help me to love others with all of myself. Help me to fully experience both joy and sorrow. Be with me in it all.

First Day of Tot Lot

Today was Isaac's first day at Tot Lot. Turns out I ended up being "one of those parents". I didn't want to leave him there all alone, not knowing anyone... What if he falls down? What if he wants me? What if he pushes someone? and on and on... I lingered a while but finally did say good-bye. Well, turns out HE was fine. It was just me, missing him each minute I was away and wondering what he was doing. When we (my mom, Chloe and I) came back to get him, he was happily playing with playdough with the other kids.
Isaac, right in the middle of things...
Isaac's first "craft".

I think I'll be able to get used to this pretty fast... hanging out with Chloe, drinking coffee, browsing in Target...

Summer Fun

Yeah for water!! I don't remember parks like this being around when I was a kid. Then again, I can't complain since we had a great pool with the bounciest diving board ever right in our backyard!!

In case you live in the area, this is at Mayfair Park, in Lakewood. I highly recommend it. Isaac and company had a blast. It's open 11-4 all summer and it's free!

Isn't She Cute???

Chloe is starting to smile and chat with us. She's getting to be so much fun!! Here a few cute pictures of a fashion show I subjected her to one morning when Isaac was staying at Omi's house. It really is harder to take pictures of the second one!

New Found Joys

Chloe's newest joy is sucking her two middle fingers. Makes us very happy too because now she can fall asleep all by herself!! No more standing over her bassinet to hold in a pacifier.


This summer Isaac has been enjoying harvesting vegetables from our backyard (and Omi's). He loves picking "komatoes" (tomatoes), was fascinated to find this carrot under the ground, and is just itching to pick the watermelon that he's watching grow bigger and bigger by the day.
Isaac also loves playing baseball, particulary in his uniform of choice: rainboots and a diaper!!

Grandparents

There are many things I am grateful for. One of the blessings at the top of my list has to be the fact that Isaac and Chloe have four amazing grandparents. Each unique, offering our kids different gifts, but equally loving and important. We are so grateful that they all live within driving distance so they can be enjoyed frequently by us all!!

Chloe with Grandma on the beach

Rockin out with Grandpa

Swinging with Omi and Opa in their backyard

Story time with Opa

Fun in the fountain with Omi at Chapman University